In the midst and magic of motherhood, there are a few parts of life that can get overlooked or simply not spoken about. Sex drive and desire can be one of those things that do get lost amongst birthing and raising children.
By both partners understanding the hormonal, physical and emotional changes that are happening inside the body, it creates more context for the change in sexual behaviour with one another. Regular conversation focused on intimacy with your partner is essential throughout postpartum and into parenting. When we're able to open up the space for discussion, there is active awareness and intention about how the intimate relationship changes.
Eliminate the pressure.
Release the idea that you have to perform, 'finish' or crave sex as you may have previously. Appreciate where you are in this stage of life, accept the changes and acknowledge that everything in life is in ebb and flow.
Gigi Hadid by Luigi and Iango
Vaginal dryness and extra sensitivity due to the rise in prolactin and low estrogen is common. Using a clean ingredient, pH-balanced lube well suited to you will make a world of difference. All of our lubes have been ingredient checked and chosen for their ingredients and internal safety, with no taste or fragrances added for sensitive skin. Shop our list of recommendations here.
Daryl Hannah + John F. Kennedy Jr
As hard as it might be to find the time to increase foreplay now that there are children in the house, try to encourage foreplay for as long as possible. Using massage as a form of foreplay, not only relaxes the body but sends signals of care and surrender. While also being mindful, some mothers may feel 'touched out' by children clinging to them all day. Knowing that you don't want to be touched is okay too, it's communicating it to your partner that helps enormously.
Herbs and adaptogens
With the rise in stress from sleep deprivation and raising children nourishing our bodies with calming herbs and adaptogens can be helpful. Ashwagandha, Passionflower, Reishi mushroom and Rhodiola are linked to calming the nervous system and are able to be taken in a powder or capsule form. Our blend is a gummie that you can take twice a day which helps support a healthy libido system.
Shop Rose Quartz Yoni Eggs here
Pelvic Floor Exercises.
Postpartum, is it extremely common to lose strength in our pelvic floor. A strong pelvic floor is responsible for strong bladder control and enhances orgasms. Using tools like Kegal Balls
and Yoni Eggs
can be helpful to activate these internal muscles and see improvement. Deep pelvic breathing is another option, which essentially means you take deep breaths and send them down to your cervix and connect to your sexual organs for 5-10 minutes a day. Not only is this shifting your awareness, but it gives you time to listen to what you want and what your body needs.