Dorota Wócjik by Mario Sorrenti, June 1997
Into the mind
“Women have to arouse their mind, or often their body just won’t respond."
- Laurei Watson, PHD, LMFT, Certified Sex Therapist.
Understanding our internal landscape requires some investigation into the mind. Using visualisation to encourage this, whether it is a memory, a partner, a body or perhaps a taboo act. Uncovering what visuals or fantasies bring about warm to erotic feelings. Everyone is vastly unique, so what works for your friend may not work for you, this practice is all self exploration.
Having an ultra attuned awareness is a key to many doors. However encouraging just an inch of it everyday help us recognise what brings us a bit of spark. Is it a compliment from your partner? A gentle touch, a hug or a hand held? Perhaps it's a gift, or an act of service. Start to read your own love language and give it to yourself. Buy the gift, compliment yourself, rest your palms onto your heart and feel the beat. Start with small observations and bring it into action.
Ritual is the beauty in taking time, creating space to engage in something sacred. Bringing ourself back in to harmony in our ever taxing world requires tools to help engage in daily or weekly rituals to remind us of the life we are wanting to create. Creating time to use your vibrator, run a bath or lay in front of the mirror with your wand is a beautiful way to engage with self-pleasure and discover what you enjoy the most.
Set the Mood
Lighting Candles: A very simple, yet powerful way to calm the nervous system by viewing a low, natural light.
Palm Inhalation: Our sense of smell has a direct pathway to the limbic system, the part of our brain that is responsible for emotion, memory, and motivation. By applying a few drops of a pure essential oil on the palm of your hands, and taking a deep breath in nurtures our sense of desire and motivations.
Self Massage: Getting in touch with our own body by self massage can be one of the most soothing and arousing rituals. Whether this be with your hands or your wand or vibrator, use a slightly warmed oil and slowly massaging your entire body. This not only stimulates blood flow and assists in draining the lymphatic system, it also gives us signals of what areas of the body are most pleasurable to be touched. Self massage can also evolve to be a gratitude practise, to thank all parts of our body that do so much for us. We recommend engaging in this practice after a warm bath or shower so the skin will be warm and moisturised.
Image from Charlotte Taylor