Have you ever masturbated or had sex and thought, "I wish that was better"? Well, you're not alone, many people find it hard to stay present while having sex or find that societal pressures, stress or exhaustion make it hard for them to have the libido to truly enjoy it.
Find some of the best advice for increasing your mind body connection.
Touch your self
Finding time for yourself is one of the biggest keys in helping you stay present when you're with a partner. Find time to touch yourself for 15-30 minutes without focusing on whether or not you have an orgasm.
Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, PHD, sexologist and relationship expert says, that in familiarising your self with your body's unique response to touch - whether it be with toys (shop our best sellers for solo play, Sona, Muse, Kip), hands, lube, massage oil or objects of various textures and temperatures - you'll find your sensation radar heightens and you'll be more likely to find pleasure to increase your enjoyment of an orgasm.
Photo by @thecashmeremuse
Simple and yet so effective. Heat is a natural and easy way to get your body in the mood. It increases blood flow to your vulva, leading to heightened sensitivity and natural lubrication.
Heat can be as simple as warm wash cloth placed over your vulva for a few minutes, a hot bath or our personal favourite, an Arousal Serum.
© Lothar Rübelt, 1925, Suzanne Lenglen, Wiener Park Club, Vienna
Dr. McDevitt, a sexologist, sexuality educator and sexual wellness coach, says, "nothing says amazing orgasms like a strong pelvic floor." The key to this? Adding kegels to your list of regular exercises.
How do you kegel? Start by emptying your bladder, lay down with your knees up and your heels within touching distance from your hands, then squeeze your pelvic floor muscles. Hold for 3 to 5 seconds and then relax the muscle for 3 to 5 seconds. Repeat this 10 times in the morning, afternoon and night. Consistency over a 3 week period makes a huge difference to your orgasms.
Discover the Jade Yoni Kegel Set here, harnessing the cleansing power of Jade for balance and healing, or the vibrating kegels here for both pleasure and exercise.
Becoming hyper-focused on your breath can slow down your mind and can make you more aware and sensitive to full-body sensations. Try to synchronise your breath with your partners while focusing on traveling your breath through your core and down each limb.